One hope that I have when you think about working with children and families who come from diverse backgrounds is that what I say and how I act displays my character. I want the students in my room to know that I am open and honest, and I truly want what is best for them. It is important for children to be able to explore and form their own opinions, but it’s also important for them to be brought up with good influences and open minds. Everyone is different and that is ok. In fact, it is GREAT because that allows us to learn and grow from each other. When we teach children to ask questions and get to know different cultures and races and fight back against stereotypes, we are guiding them to be better people who understand that differences make us unique and special.

One goal that I would like to set for the early childhood field is to be able to teach other educators to be open-minded and accepting by educating themselves as best they can when we have diverse students in our classrooms. Also, it is important to let others know that IT IS OK to ask questions when you don’t know! Questioning in a respectful way shows that you care and you truly do want what is best for the child and that you want to learn more about them and their differences from yourself. When we treat others with respect and self-worth we infuse that same goodness into our children who are the next generation to lead.  

Finally, a thank you to all of my colleagues this course.  As we continue our journey to our Masters degree and growing as anti-bias educators, I  appreciate all of the  feedback and discussions we have had through our blogs and discussion boards. It is not easy being an educator, especially in our current situations, but when we band together to encourage and help each other out, we make it through stronger not only for our students, but for ourselves as well. WE GOT THIS!

While most people may think of art at “just” paper and paint, Art comes in many different formats and one of my favorites is books. As a child, my sisters and I loved looking through picture books, making up our own stories, retelling ones we heard over and over, and learning important life lessons from them. Some of my very favorite quotes come from children’s books, and have helped me through some tough times. First I created a collage of the inspiring children’s quotes that have helped build my character and mold me into the teacher I have become today as well as quotes about the importance of books in a person’s life.

In my own journey to become an anti-bias teacher and after our Week 6 discussion/evaluations of classic vs. contemporary children’s books, I started realizing how it has become my passion to share the best diversity books for children with my fellow educators. For children, viewing the illustrations and listening to the words is a poignant as reading them for themselves. Children learn by what they see and hear and it’s important to be making sure the right messages of acceptance of diversity is being seen by them. The books I have selected to share in these collages are not only tools for parents and teachers to use in guiding children to be kind and respectful human beings, but they can also inspire children to be mindful of racisms, tolerance, gender acceptance, differing abilities, special needs, and various cultures. These books prove that you can take hard taboo topics and make them relatable and understandable for children which we have learned throughout this course as so incredibly important.

I was in a restaurant once (pre-COVID) where several of us were seated and standing in the crowded waiting area for our tables when one little Caucasian girl tugged on her mom’s sleeve and asked loudly (but not rudely, just inquisitively) “Mom, why is her skin so black? We don’t look like that” The mom was visibly embarrassed by the question and shushed her child by just saying, “because that’s her skin” and kind of apologetically looked at the woman in question. The little girl wasn’t satisfied by that answer and questioned again, “but WHY? She is the only I’ve seen like that. It’s so dark”. Instead of trying to answer, the mother just stood up and tried to change the subject by saying something like, “hey! we didn’t go potty and wash our hands before lunch! Let’s go now” and basically “drug” her away in embarrassment.

Instead of trying to factually answer her question, the mother just tried to change the subject and move on, even though the child was just thoughtfully questioning. She wasn’t rude to the woman, and actually, the woman herself didn’t even seem upset by the question, and I believe might have actually talked to the child and answered her had the mother given her time. Instead, by teaching the child that that type of questioning is a “taboo” subject, the child is learning that that person must be different and it’s not right to talk to them about it. It could also begin to put in place a superiority complex in the child if they are believing that everyone should look like them. I don’t know if this was the first black person she saw, or if she actually meant that this African American woman did indeed look much darker than any other black person she might have met or seen in her life. Since the mother also didn’t answer her question, the message could also have come across that the daughter’s thinking and questioning mind wasn’t good enough or appropriate. I do genuinely believe that the little girl was just curious and not at all ill-minded or rude, so not getting an appropriate or factual answer could make her think that she was wrong to ask such a question. Derman-Sparks (2010) states that, “from the first year of their life, children begin to notice differences and similarities among the people who surround them. By age 3, children begin asking questions about their own and other’s attributes, including racial identify, language, gender, and physical disabilities” (p. 12).

An anti-bias approach answer to this girls question could have been a discussion on melanin. The mother could have explained that the skin color of different humans comes from how much of the pigment melanin is produced in the skin. The more melanin your body has, the darker your skin color. This is a factual explanation that would suffice the child and not have to make either the mother or African American woman uncomfortable. If the child was still curious, maybe the mother could then have said that they could look up more about this after they had lunch and it might have ended the conversation on a more positive note. At home, the mother could have discussed more about the African American culture/heritage if the child was looking for more information like that.

References

Derman-Sparks, L, & Olsen Edwards, J. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, D.C.: NAEYC.

          

This week we watched the two videos on Gender & Gender identity and Sexual orientation. One of my biggest pet peeves in the classroom are the adults who do not want to let their son “play with dolls” or “dress up” in the dramatic play area and the ones who make the remarks about the girls pretending to be architects in the block area, “well that will never happen”. It makes me cringe, and I struggle with overstepping my boundaries with parents when decided what I want to say to them and approach the topic. My classroom is ALL INCLUSIVE, and I encourage child to play with, how, and experiment however they want. I love reading the book Pink is for Boys by Robb Pearlman which delves into those boy vs. girls stereotypes, and every year I still have at least one child who, after hearing the title, says, “no, only girls like pink!” and it makes me cringe. Yet, every year, I still read it and invoke conversations between my students about why we think these things. In the Gender video, Laureate Education (n.d.) stated that, “asking questions encourages children to share their diverse experiences and perspectives.” and it is so true. You can find out so much from children when you just ask. I also get frustrated when I go to the store and see how the toys are typically separated into “boys” vs. “girls” with the boys side being all Legos, trucks, and all things blue while the girls side is all Barbies, babies, pink and sparkles. It’s important to have that choice as a child to explore and decide whether you like something or not, and not allow a stereotype to be forced in your face.

           

While I have never heard a child in my class use any homophobic terms, I was myself thrown into an unexpected situation my very first year teaching at my job in Philly. My coworker and I were meeting with families and we had a child come in with her two moms. I admit, that my first reaction toward them was not that they were a lesbian couple, but that they were sisters (as with a diverse school, isn’t uncommon, especially if there is language barriers). Throughout the meeting, one mom was more dominant in the conversation and answering questions, and it wasn’t until when her partner went to complete paperwork as where I made the assumption aloud that I needed only the parent and legal guardian to sign paperwork. She politely then told me that “she was legal guardian—they both were” and could bring in their daughters’ birth certificate if I had any questions. I was mortified and apologized profusely for making my inconsiderate remark and assumption. Fortunately, we ended up having a great relationship with these ladies and were honored to teach their son 3 years later, but I still can’t believe that as a teacher, I acted like that. It ended up being a good thing, as I asked to sit down with the ladies and have a real conversation with them, asking them their preferences and how they wanted me to address their relationship if it would come up in conversation with the students (especially since we do an All About Me and a Family Members Unit) Because I took the time to speak with them, and honestly, get out of my comfort zone, I was prepared when my students peers started to argue with her that “she can’t have two mommies, you only have one, and one daddy”. We read several books and had discussions about the topic and eventually had both of her moms agree to come in. I was happily surprised to find my students eager to accept this “different” type of family once they saw it. They accepted it and moved on without more questions but this experienced helped me grow not only as a teacher, but as a person as well. While my initial comment and assumption was not meant to be hurtful, it still was a type of a microaggression I am more aware of now. It also made me more aware of how I teach about families and the differences we can see amongst our friends families. In the Sexual Orientation video, Laureate Education (n.d.) stated that “it is important to acknowledge the existence of families with gay and lesbian parents, so that children are prepared to be respectful when they do meet people who are lesbian or gay” and I agree wholeheartedly. When taught to be accepting from a young age, children will hopefully grow up with more tolerance for difficult issues and those “taboo” topics.

References:

Laureate Education (Producer). (n.d.). Start seeing diversity: Sexual orientation [Video file]. Retrieved from https://class.waldenu.edu

Laureate Education (Producer). (n.d.). Start seeing diversity: Gender [Video file]. Retrieved from https://class.waldenu.edu

Well, the time has finally come once again! We have to say good-bye but this time it is a little bittersweet because I’ll be ending my collaborations with most of you since I’m taking a break for the summer. I’ll be back in August for the next class, but I suspect I won’t get to be with most of you anymore. We have learned how to be compassionate communicators and have been pushed out of our comfort zones a bit this semester and I am proud of us all. If anyone wants to stay in touch, feel free to contact me via email bpyle@pasos.aspirapa.org (I’m going to be honest, unless I email a professor, I don’t really check my Walden email; this is my work email) or send me a DM/friend request on Facebook!

I would like to express my profound gratitude to Cassandra, Shameeka, Katie, Beatriz, and Maria for the support, thoughts, experiences, constructive feedback, and comments during the discussion boards. Whether I was responding to you or you to mine, I always gained a new insight and enjoyed our weekly discussions. I can see a difference in my professional life and think that you might also have felt the same way. To Latorshia, Teresa, and Savannah, thank you for your blog posts and personal contributions each week and I know I mostly responded to yours. I enjoyed reading about your personal experiences and how what we were learning fit into your professional lives, and a lot of times we had similar experiences.

I wish you all the best of luck on your next journey with Walden University and your profession. I hope through this course and our continued journeys on the way to our respective Masters degrees that our communication and collaboration skills have been strengthened.

There’s always going to be both positive and negative experiences with every group thing you do in life. These experiences will differ based on the group participants, the situation, and the group size. Usually problems occur because of a lack of communication or when someone wants to be “too much” in charge and overtakes the rest. But overall, I have pretty many positive experiences when working in groups.

I do believe that high-performing groups are the hardest to leave because we have stuck together through all of the previous stages. We’ve become high functional and work effectively because there is strong communication and leadership with clear goals and trust has been built between all team members. At this level we have made team growth *together* and I think that’s what differs and makes the Performing stage better and more effective than the Norming stage where some groups get caught up in. Abudi (2010) states that during this stage “the team is highly motivated to get the job done and they can make decisions and problem solve quickly and effectively.”

The hardest group I ever had to leave was from my first teaching job. I started in the preschool room as an assistant teacher and quickly moved up to a co-lead teacher. Two years in, I was asked to also lead the before and after school program during the school year and then, in the summer, run the Summer Camp program as well. While working there I had the pleasure of teaching many of the staff children, through my preschool room and then as they grew up and continued through the summer camp program, so I really connected not only with my co-workers as staff members, but as parents as well. Since we were a smaller, privately-owned childcare center, all of the staff became quick friends, no matter what room we were in. Although stronger bonds were formed between the similar classrooms (like the pre-k and preschool rooms and the two toddler rooms) everyone was still able to work together as one and communicate well. We enjoyed planning lots of special events and participating in monthly staff meetings. When I unexpectedly was offered my current job, I was devastated to be leaving, but excited to move up in my teaching journey. My co-workers were sad I was leaving, but supported and encouraged my move to Philadelphia. Because I had been there for so long and created so many wonderful memories with everyone, it was hard to let go. My moving away from what I loved and was familiar with was scary because I did have to step out of my comfort zone and what I was used to, but I knew that I was ready and it was time to experience something new.

• 

• 

Most of the closing rituals I have experienced were in forms of parties, and the one that is most memorable to me was my going away party at Springrose. Part of their decorations included everyone (including my co-workers and even my students from Summer Camp) creating a memory for me and pasting it around the room. So many wonderful things were said and talked about that made me tear up. Seeing the different ways I had affected not only my friends but also the kids that I taught made me bawl like a baby. Once I took them down and brought them home, I made a book out of them that I keep with me. It was so wonderful reading about fun memories or times that I had touched someone. Honestly, I couldn’t tell you which was best; my co-workers or the kids words. So many of them loved and appreciated my ability to act like a kid too and create fun and memorable activities and field trips for summer camp. They had even changed the activity for my last day to be Paint Wars, which they knew was my absolute favorite activity of all. They made me go outside and while I was setting up, they all signed a special shirt for me and decorated it. I couldn’t believe the effort that was made to let me know how much they loved and appreciated me… it was truly amazing, and of the hardest, yet most heartwarming days ever.

• 

• 

I don’t expect the same amount of sentiment during Walden’s Adjourning stage as I did at my previous jobs, only because we don’t have the same connection working face to face. However, the online relationships we have created are still strong since we are all working towards the same goal and helping each other achieve it through our conversations in discussion boards and these blog posts. I know I have even reached out to some of my colleagues through Facebook and we have created relationships through there as well because of our similar teaching experiences or personalities. The ideas, feedback, and conversations we have all had together will be a connection I will greatly miss after our Masters journeys end.

The adjourning stage is essential simply because it brings closure to a good thing. It allows us to take the time to look back on what we have learned, how we learned it, and who we learned from. It brings good memories and connections to the people we worked with.

References

Abudi, G. (2010). The five stages of team development: A case study. Retrieved from http://www.projectsmart.co.uk/the-five-stages-of-team-development-a-case-study.html

Since the COVID quarantine, I have been staying with my sister and brother-in-law to help watch my niece H (now 5 years old) and nephew L (now 3 years old). When this began, my sister was pregnant and just had her baby girl a month ago, so it has been incredibly crazy in the house. The conflict I have been having recently is that my brother in law is incredibly spacy. He has ADHD and other issues and because of this he needs to be told EVERYTHING in explicit detail. You cannot assume that he will see the trash is full and naturally take it out or dishes in the sink and place them in the dishwasher. My sister will be trying to feed a fussy infant while I’m running around after the other two and he will be sitting on his computer in his own little world. He has very selective perception, which, according to O’Hair et. el (2018) is when he “chooses to attend to some things while ignoring others and often selectively pay attention to the information that is consistent with our schemas” (p.56). It is incredibly frustrating to me to see that my sister is struggling and he does not even realize it, nor will he step in to help. The few times when I have (slightly angrily) “mentioned” it to him when my sister was particularly upset, he did as I asked him to do in order to help at that exact moment, but when a similar instance occurred an hour later with my niece and nephew fighting, he seemed to have blocked them out and didn’t attempt anything to help my sister out. When I asked my sister about his behaviors and what she would have done had I not been here to help she pretty much sighed and said she just has to deal with it and does things herself.

The first way I need to go about this conversation is by focusing on one of the 3R’s; being very respectful. Cheshire (2007) states that, “respect is shown in ways similar to how they would like to be treated” (p.36). This is not my house and I do not want to be accusing my brother-in-law or speaking aggressively. I also do not want to create a defensive climate, which according to O’Hair et.el. (2018) “are those in which the people involved feel threatened. It becomes an atmosphere of mistrust…” (p. 220). My brother-in-law is also a lawyer, so he is used to being defensive and arguing his point. I on the other hand take conflict personally, and would rather do anything OTHER than debate and fight, however, I do want to let him know that it not only frustrates me, but also my sister when he ignores things that are right in front of his face. I also need to be careful of my relationship. I do not want to be alienated from my sister or my brother-in-law because I offended him with my opinion based on what I am experiencing while I am living with them. The thing I do need to be is empathetic, because he did explain to me once when I grew frustrated with that, that with his ADHD his mind is moving a million times a minute and he often has to be actively thinking about something in order to see it. He gets distracted easily by things most people do not and his mind will wonder, therefore forgetting what you just asked him to do 5 minutes ago. Since I do not have ADHD myself, I can’t really put myself in his place and understand what he is going through. This is why we have to compromise with our immediate, explicit instructions for him. With Nonviolent Communication (NVC) we learn to hear our own deeper needs and those of others. Through its emphasis on deep listening—to ourselves as well as others—NVC helps us discover the depth of our own compassion (The Center for nonviolent communication, n.d.). When the trash is ready, we have to ask him, “Will, can you take the trash to the garbage can outside right now, please? or, “Will, the baby is crying. Can you please pick her up and see if she needs a diaper change?” We use the 3R’s by being respectful, watch for his response (and ours) and I can use NVC empathetic listening to establish an effective relationship with him.

A question for my colleagues, is how do you deal with someone who is “always right?” Because my brother-in-law loves to debate and as a lawyer, is well versed in this area, we usually just end up giving up to end the conversation because he refuses to “lose” even if he knows he is wrong. I can see why my sister says she “just deals with it” but it’s frustrating to me watching her struggling with her three children when it should be a team effort. Does anyone have a strategy for effectively communicating with him and not growing frustrated?

References

Cheshire, N. (2007). The 3 R’s: Gateway to Infant Toddler Learning. Dimensions of Early Childhood. Volume 35, No. 3.

O’Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J. (2018). Real communication: An introduction (4th. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

The Center for Nonviolent communication. (n.d.). The center for nonviolent communication. http://www.cnvc.org/

This week we had to have two people complete the same three evaluations that we completed about ourselves. Since we are still in quarantine and I’m not at work, I had to have two family members complete the evaluations of me; my mom and my sister. Since we are very alike, I was not actually surprised to find out that we had similar results. These are two people who know me best, and have seen me communicate naturally and as a teacher, so they both mentioned that it was easy for them to answer the questions about me because they could visualize me in both situations. I actually wish that I could have had a co-worker or one of my classroom parents complete these evaluations to see how they see me as a teacher. Ideally, I would have had one family member and one co-worker compete these to see how the answers might have differed, possibly due to the situations they see me most often in. Most of my scores were very similar; the Verbal Aggressiveness Scale was almost spot on for all 3 of us. Both my mom and I scored myself with a 61 and my sister scored me with a 62, firmly placing me in the Moderate level, which is a great balance between respect and consideration for other’s feelings. The highest difference in scores came from the Communication Anxiety Inventory in which I scored myself at a 37 and my mom scored me at 40, placing me in the Mild level where sometimes I can feel a bit uneasy in some situations, but confident in most. My sister scored me at a 29 however, which at a low level states that I feel comfortable communicating in most situations.

I was most surprised by my Listening Styles Profile scores. I scored a 27 for myself, which places me in the Action-Oriented Listening Style. This describes me as business-like, and prefer clear, to-the-point communication that outlines a plan of action. I do believe this fits me as a teacher-communicator. I am very well organized, and definitely prefer to have a plan as opposed to just “winging things” in the classroom. However, both scores that were given by my sister and mom fell into group 1, which places me as People-Oriented. This describes me as more empathetic and concerned with the emotions of people. I think this is because both my mom and sister are recipients of the empathy I give *after* I have already created a plan of action and initiated it, therefore creating the results that they see or are affected by.

The similarities in all of my results mean that the way I perceive myself is the way others see me. What I realized was that sometimes our behavior influences the people around us, but also the feedback of these people in our lives confirms who we really are. The insight I got from this evaluation exercise was self –actualization, which is defined by O’Hair et. el (2018) as “the feelings and thoughts you get when you know that you have successfully negotiated a communication situation” (p.69) and self-adequacy. Self-adequacy is defined by O’Hair et. el (2018) as “when you assess your communication competence as sufficient or acceptable [but] may feel a subsequent desire for self-improvement” (p. 69). As much as I feel fulfilled and satisfied with how I communicate, and was glad to note that others consider me a competent communicator, I also think that my communication competence is acceptable to people I interact with on a daily basis, both professionally and personally. I also realized that sometimes the way I communicate at work is different from how I communicate with friends and my family. As a professional, I should know how to switch my communication style to suit the situation in order to be a more effective communicator.

References

O’Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J. (2018). Real communication: An introduction (4th. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

I think it is natural to communicate differently with different types of people, and that includes cultural differences. When I am speaking with my family and friends in my hometown where I grew up in the country, we speak slowly, in neutral tones and in English. But in Philadelphia where I work, I tend to take on a more Latina type language; speaking quickly, in loud excited tones and often time in a mix of English and Spanish, especially with my students. With the parents of my room, I will speak in a more professional tone, but still with my “Spanish” accent. My body language is usually more formal than if I were speaking to friends or my co-workers, which is more relaxed and also uses more nonverbal cues, where sometimes conversations occur without spoken words (such as head nods, thumbs up/down, ect) but with facial expressions and interaction management cues. Something that I will do, that changes when speaking with people of different cultures, is substituting. This is helpful when I am speaking with one of Spanish-speaking families and my co-teacher isn’t available. I will often mimic what I mean using gestures that can be determined in both languages. Some of my parents prefer speaking formally with me, where I will address them by their last name, instead of speaking in a more informal tone that I usually adapt with most of my parents over the school year. However, this is important for me to address at the beginning of the year, as I know that in some cultures, they have the highest respect for the teachers and expect only professionalism, and not “friendships” with them. But understanding the culture and asking questions about it, I learn what people expect and then can become an effective communicator.

Three Strategies for becoming a more effective communicator

Adaptation: As I mentioned earlier, I use “Spanglish” when communicating with my Spanish colleagues and families; I like showing that I can learn and recall certain word or phrases in Spanish and include them in conversations. It shows understanding and creates a bond, as well as shows that I am trying to communicate with them in their preferred language and not just expecting them to learn English for me. “Those who adapt to others appropriately and sensitively are more likely to experience more positive communication. Adapting to others doesn’t mean you only tell others what they want to hear and do what others want you to do…be aware of what your communication partner is saying, especially if there are cultural differences between you so that your message is understood” (Beebee, Beebee, & Redmond, 2011, p.112).

Empathic listening: I will have to try as much as possible to see others’ points of view. Although sometimes I am empathetic, I think there is a need for me to be more respectful to other people’s emotions and see issues from their point of view. This could prevent imposing my ideas or opinions on others.  “Recognize that learning unwritten cultural rules of nonverbal communication takes time and patience the best approach is to be aware of differences and to read the feedback from the parent or family, and member exhibiting them. Try different approaches if you are picking up discomfort if you attend to communicate.” Gonzales-Mena, 2010, p 81). When you are empathetic, you do more listening and observing rather than speaking and understanding nonverbal cues is important.

Listening and asking questions: It is tough and awkward asking uncomfortable questions about a culture I am not familiar with. I feel rude sometimes inquiring about their personal life and cultural preferences, but I have learned that being an active listener and asking to follow up questions makes one an excellent communicator. People we communicate with must feel our presence and involvement. This practice can help build good rapport among colleagues and the families in your classroom. Being open and honest during this time also sets forth an expectation between you and the cultural family and builds that confident communication with each other. Beebee, Beebee, and Redmond (2011) states that, “the skill of observing and responding with creative flexibility enhances your intercultural competence. While listening to someone, you’re also adapting your behavior to respond to person’s cultural expectations” (p.110).

References

Beebe S.A, BeeBe S.J., and Redmond M.V. (2011). Interpersonal Communication:  Relating to others (6^th ed.) Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon. Chapter 4, “Interpersonal Communication & Diversity: Adapting to Others” (pp.85-114)

O’Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J. (2018). Real communication: An introduction (4th. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

For this blog assignment, I chose to watch the first episode of the Netflix show The Ranch. I didn’t know what it was about other than making assumptions from the title and the fact that Ashton Kutcher was in it. It didn’t seem like a show I’d be interested and watching even though I knew the actor.

In the opening scene with the credits I was shown baby pictures including those of two boys and presumably a dad, so when I first meet the characters, I assumed that Ashton Kutcher, and Danny Masterson (who I recognized from That 70’s Show) must be brothers. An older man walked in and immediately the boys stood up. I perceived from the looks on their faces that they were excited because they both smiled and held their hands out in a welcoming gesture. The dad seemed hesitant, as if he were unsure why Ashton was there, but then also smiled. Ashton then began to tell a story and was very excited about it with his hands flailing, eyes wide, smile on his face. Both Danny and the father didn’t seem too impressed, as I noted the dad cocking his head and speaking slowly, in a southern drawl. His expression didn’t seem to show enthusiasm like Ashton, but also there was no other emotions. Eventually he spoke and both of their demeanor changed quickly that I could sense some tension. At one point both Ashton and the dad stood up and faced each other and there was clearly arguing going on; hands were being raised, fists clenched, shaking heads and their eye contact was not being broken. Danny’s character during this time is one of amusement, as he is drinking beer and laughs at whatever Ashton is saying. They leave and the scene moves to a bar, where a woman turns around and gets excited to see Ashton. She greets him with a hug, but seems older, so I am assuming she is either his mom or another mother-type to him. As she begins to converse more with him though, her demeanor seems to change to a more negative reaction to him as well. She crosses her arms as he speaks and looks down disappointed. I definitely don’t think that Ashton has such great relationships with the people he is around, and seems to not be the best kind of character. As the show progressed it was clear to me that Ashton has a rocky relationship with his dad, and although a humorous one with his brother, it definitely seems to be distance between them. At one point Ashton holds out his hands expecting and the dad walks over, but picks up a baby calf instead, so Ashton drops his hands and rolls his eyes. The relationship with his brother is a little bit better, but I could still detect tension between them as at least 3x they sat down for long talks that seemed to be pensive and not happy, easy-going comradery between brothers.

After I watched the episode with sound, I was pleased to discover that I was pretty close in my assumptions of the relationships with the characters. Ashton had been away playing professional football, and his father (Beau) was not initially pleased of his return to the family ranch after 15 years. Ashton (Colt) and Danny (Rooster) were brothers, and while their relationship was a strained from Ashton’s leaving, Danny was more accepting of his brother’s return than his dad. The woman in the bar turned out to be their mother who own the bar and has a strained on/off relationship with the dad and her sons. The show and actors did a good job showing emotions which could be interpreted well enough without the sound on. No one thinks that Ashton’s character will stay or be able to handle the ranch’s responsibilities

It would have definitely been easier to understand even more context if I was watching a TV show that I knew because you already understand the characters and their relationships. You could tune out other background clues to what is happening or how characters look and focus on the leakage cues that show what the characters are thinking or feeling.

O’Hair et. el (2018) states that “nonverbal communication is ambiguous. In many cases you can pick up clues about the meaning of behavior from the situational context.” Since I was watching a new show, I had to make assumptions about certain characters solely from their non-verbal actions, such as sighs, blinking, crossing arms, ect. I also had to figure out what the situation was. Since it was a pilot episode that I was watching which are usually made to introduce and explain things to the watcher, it was a little bit easier to figure out how Ashton Kutcher clearly had not been home for awhile and his homecoming wasn’t a thrill to everyone, including himself. Watching the show in silence helped me think about my own teaching experiences from the standpoint of my students, especially my bilingual children. If a student speaks only Spanish and I’m speaking only English, can they even figure out what I am trying to say/teach solely by my facial expressions or kinetics? It makes me wonder and really want to focus on this, especially as online teaching has become “the thing” we need to do. I watched a video of myself I sent to my students and I was a little shocked at how I looked, and wondered how I was communicating with them and what I can do better. If they were watching me with the sound off, would I be able to get my point across? Could they figure out the importance? It’s something that now that I’m aware of, as a teacher I’m going to make more of an effort to reach out to them and model this appropriately.

References:

O’Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J. (2018). Real communication: An introduction (4th. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.